need to do more substantial revisions

a question from a history 134 class quiz 5 points short paragraph 1
October 15, 2021
summary report memo 1
October 15, 2021

need to do more substantial revisions

Please help me fix this article follow the teacher comment. The teacher said “You do a good job establishing the seriousness of the problem. Your language is also clear with appropriate word choice. You do write about several different ideas, though, and it’s not clear how they relate. It’s not clear how critical thinking skills relate to a positive attitude and communication skills. You might need to cut one or two ideas and elaborate on what’s left. You might find it helpful to just focus on one of your ideas and then provide some solutions to how students can develop that specific skill. You also need to work on being more specific and direct. As one of your peers noted, you don’t present a solution in your first paragraph. 104A students would definitely expect direct structure.”

First PDF is my article, Second PDF is this article assignment

 
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